As a child, I often spent whole afternoons watching ants. Their march, regal and purposeful, fascinated me. Grandpa once explained to me how they live and work in perfect harmony, almost like they were one single organism. He was a man in sync with nature and pointed out how not just ants, but all of life moves beautifully like a synchronized orchestra. All except humans, who seem to struggle endlessly. As I grew up, the ability to simply watch life without motive was lost somewhere. All activity and all intentions became motive-driven. It is only now, after years of getting nowhere, that I realise perception is more important. Knowing where the ants were going wasn’t necessary; the experience of watching them was. The oneness that I felt with them was. It might seem trite but bringing awareness back into our lives must take precedence over all else.

There was a children’s show called, ‘The Magic School Bus’ that I enjoyed watching with my daughter many years ago. Every aspect of the human body was explored so beautifully in animated form that I used to be hooked onto it more than her. The journey of a morsel of food, for example, was brought to life as it made it’s way through the entire alimentary canal. Sadly, we are not even aware of what goes into our mouths most times. Clearly, it’s a practice worth getting into, not just while eating, but in every aspect of our lives. Awareness brings clarity, clarity leads to freedom and freedom is the only way to higher intelligence. One cannot fly when bound up in chains.

The biggest roadblock in our growth is, of course, conditioning. It’s a tough job to unmould our thinking, but not impossible. This reminds me of a pet parrot we had for a brief time. I was probably a pre-teen then. My mother used to leave guavas and chillies for the bird and clean the cage religiously every day. I saw no point in the whole activity when neither the bird did anything for us nor did we do much except feed it daily. I was sure, the smart fellow could very well manage more than a guava and chilly if left on his own. So one quiet afternoon, during siesta, I left the cage open. To my utter dismay, the bird refused to fly. That’s how our conditioning works. We choose to stay in an open cage.


It’s time to get back on ‘The Magic School Bus’. Bringing awareness back takes practice, patience and understanding. A few months ago, I was at the St. Mary’s Basilica in Bangalore. As I sat in that beautiful, empty church with eyes closed and palms open, the intense vibrations I felt reminded me of what I had been missing. Such experiences need not be rare if one is receptive. It is not an outside phenomenon. The vibrations were comimg from within me; I just had to be open to them. This is why we need to turn inwards. Because all joy, peace, bliss and intelligence can only be found there. This is how ‘being human’ works for me.


When people ask me what my goal as a writer is, I don’t know what to say. The only goal I have set for myself is to live a conscious life; one that is boundless. I often think of our ancestral home in Mangalore that housed a large family. It had two rooms on either ends that served as kitchen and storage and a long open porch in the middle. The family slept in a neat row in that open area without any fear. I absolutely loved lying awake in the dark, gazing at the sky and the silhouette of the distant mountains. My entire summer break every year was spent there. Later, when the house was rebuilt, walls to divide the two sections were put up that left me sorely disappointed.

I have an inherent dislike for boundaries, especially the mental and emotional ones. Freedom, and the growth it encourages, is appealing and the only kind of pursuit I find myself interested in. What I do isn’t important. How I want to live and grow is.



38 thoughts on “A BOUNDLESS LIFE

  1. May you Bus of imagination never stop and the only Boundaries you ever have is to stop all negativities coming across you.
    P.S. Also get pesticide done at your home. 😉


  2. Childhood experiences are very well expressed. It took me back to my childhood. Absolutely! Freedom is the first step towards growth. Keep writing…


  3. Childhood experiences are very well expressed. It took me back to my childhood days. Absolutely! Freedom is the first step towards growth. Keep writing…


  4. ‘We leave in a open cage ‘ is storied so well that bitter truth is also garnished with attractive toppings. Love to get into your imaginary world.
    Always each of the writeup has Grandpa, childhood and current essences which takes us through the journey to the past and brings back to proceed further.
    Thanks for sharing your line of thoughts.


  5. Boundless life is very attractive but very difficult
    Coz we humans like to be bound
    We complain of the boundaries but yet cannot live without it
    Ur writings help to imagine and thank you for letting me live in an imaginary world for some time
    Keep writing and making me happy😘😘😘😘😘😘


  6. God has created this world with and gave responsibilities to each and every living and non living being. In our childhood we are closest to the nature. This is the time we understand life.
    Renuka you have put the process of understanding life so simply. Very well put in words.


  7. Awareness brings clarity, clarity leads to freedom and freedom is the only way to higher intelligence.

    This line man ♥️ beautiful 🖤


  8. Frankly I read your blog after a certain gap of time and I realised what I had been missing.. it makes fresh set of thoughts flow in and out 🙂 I love your thoughts on boundaries and walls, and I relate to them. But the best part is you pen them down so easily when people struggle to even talk about them in their mind 🙂 Great work.. keep going :*)


  9. Cannot get simpler Ren, we all get so constrained by our self created walls and boundaries that we forget the ‘Purpose’ 🙂


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